How do I find out he likes me without showing my feelings

Do it like they do it in high school and ask a mutual friend to ask him.

Why are you so afraid of rejection?

Do you feel in your heart like that means that you're unworthy or that you'll never find love? You know in your head that's not true, so use your head to combat your heart. Get yourself some self-confidence by moving away from the people & responsibilities that drain you.

<3 <3 :)